All Dressed Up and No Place to Go?
(Oh my - sore throat, fuzzy head - in the middle of a full blown cold. So, my fingers are crossed that this comes out coherently.)
Saturday night - Valentine's Day - out to dinner at a lovely neighborhood Italian restaurant. Big crowd - tables close together (great for eavesdropping) - couples everywhere.
A mere 24, maybe 30, inches from me - a delightful older couple. Look to be in their early eighties, the gentleman is very dapper in his dark suit, and the the lady - a stunner: beautifully coiffed and wearing a knock-out red suit. And they are too adorable for words. You know the type: obviously been married FOREVER, and have the playful banter (with a bit of acerbic wit) down pat.
While enjoying their cocktails, the lady starts perusing the dining room. Uh oh, there's trouble. She is not pleased. She spies two women, who she tells her husband are just not appropriately dressed. "What's wrong with them?" he asks. (He has his back to the
dining room, so can't check them out for himself.) "Their dresses," she replies. "They're dressed for a big night out, not for going out to dinner."
"Well, dear, it is Valentine's Day. Maybe that's why they're so dressy." is his response. "No, no, no," she answers, Those are the kind of dresses you wear to nightclubs - for a night on the town. Yes, they're lovely dresses, but they are not what you wear when you're going out to dinner."
"Maybe this dinner IS a big night out for them," he says pleasantly. "For some people, this would be it." And the lady makes a few more mild protestations, and the subject is closed.
Well, I'm taking this all in with a big smile. Years ago, I was scanning a "What to Wear" type book, and the author talked about this very situation. His example was a bit over-the-top: a woman decked out in sequins for dinner out. But his point was the same: if your attire is in fancy dress mode for a typically understated event, you're announcing that my life is so mundane that this little occasion has me all excited and I'm putting on the Ritz.
Splitting hairs? Perhaps. But we're all constantly sending out signals. And like it or not, attire is one of them.
So, just be aware. People do look, and they do make judgments. As for me, I was worried that I might have been too casual: black trousers and red sweater set. But the ensemble was accented with some killer jewelry, so I hope I passed the "appropriate" test.
Saturday night - Valentine's Day - out to dinner at a lovely neighborhood Italian restaurant. Big crowd - tables close together (great for eavesdropping) - couples everywhere.
A mere 24, maybe 30, inches from me - a delightful older couple. Look to be in their early eighties, the gentleman is very dapper in his dark suit, and the the lady - a stunner: beautifully coiffed and wearing a knock-out red suit. And they are too adorable for words. You know the type: obviously been married FOREVER, and have the playful banter (with a bit of acerbic wit) down pat.
While enjoying their cocktails, the lady starts perusing the dining room. Uh oh, there's trouble. She is not pleased. She spies two women, who she tells her husband are just not appropriately dressed. "What's wrong with them?" he asks. (He has his back to the
"Well, dear, it is Valentine's Day. Maybe that's why they're so dressy." is his response. "No, no, no," she answers, Those are the kind of dresses you wear to nightclubs - for a night on the town. Yes, they're lovely dresses, but they are not what you wear when you're going out to dinner."
"Maybe this dinner IS a big night out for them," he says pleasantly. "For some people, this would be it." And the lady makes a few more mild protestations, and the subject is closed.
Well, I'm taking this all in with a big smile. Years ago, I was scanning a "What to Wear" type book, and the author talked about this very situation. His example was a bit over-the-top: a woman decked out in sequins for dinner out. But his point was the same: if your attire is in fancy dress mode for a typically understated event, you're announcing that my life is so mundane that this little occasion has me all excited and I'm putting on the Ritz.
Splitting hairs? Perhaps. But we're all constantly sending out signals. And like it or not, attire is one of them.
So, just be aware. People do look, and they do make judgments. As for me, I was worried that I might have been too casual: black trousers and red sweater set. But the ensemble was accented with some killer jewelry, so I hope I passed the "appropriate" test.
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